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10 Things People with a Brain Injury Would Like to Hear...

Comments [85]

BrainLine

10 Things People with a Brain Injury Would Like to Hear...

TBI defined by the people who are living with it ...

BrainLine asked our online community to share the things they would most like to hear from their friends and family, and the list below captures some of the many responses so generously provided by people with TBI.

Every individual’s experience with traumatic brain injury is unique, but there are many common symptoms and emotions. Anger, fear, sadness, and anxiety may be accompanied by difficulties with memory, pain, and the challenges of maintaining relationships.

We encourage you to add your own definitions in the comments section below, and to join the BrainLine community on Facebook, Twitter, YouTube, and Pinterest.


1. I'm sorry. How can I help?
– Alison

2. Please tell me what having a TBI is like. Can you tell me where I can read more about TBI?
– Melody

3. I don't know how you feel, but you are my friend and I will always be there for you.
– AmyRenee

4. I admire your willpower. You will get through this.
– Amina

5. I know I don't understand what it's like, but I will try my hardest to be patient and understanding.
– Christy

6. Take your time — we are not in a hurry.
– Lisa

7. When are you going grocery shopping, I want to go, too. Or, what yard work can I come do?
– Darla

8. I don't know what to say but I'm sorry it happened to you.
– Crystal

9. The you that is YOU hasn't changed. You just have a harder time thinking than you used to.
– Fred

10. I will bring you some delicious healthy brain foods and snacks — and come to sweep and do laundry, but don't worry, I won't stay too long.
– Heal Your Concussion

Comments [85]

In the year 2003 I awoke after a crash in University Hospital to a wonderful loving wife, unfortunately, TBI came with the awakening. Now, after the years have gone by, TBI never goes away, and the symptoms from it have caused a strain on my wife's life too. I wish it was easier after all this time, but it isn't, I am certainly glad to still be here, but in what content, so many things do not compute, I wish I could fix myself, and be the person I used to be. Where to turn to help my wife's life be better and me stay in it too?? I have met so many people who desperately need help, but society seems to only go so far, is there someplace where we both could be helped,..I realize I cannot be the person I WAS, but maybe understand and deal with things enough to be the loving husband I used to be and for my wife, she could understand and cope too, she deserves a happier life as well. Thank you Very Much.

Mar 7th, 2017 1:18am

Getting extremely upset when asked the same question constantly, but on different days.

Nov 3rd, 2016 11:28pm

Just an FYI for caregivers-watch for loops-being caught in a cycle of repetition that leads nowhere. This is extremely frustrating and would be nice to have this pointed out, because most times we don't see it. I saw the above comment and had to add. I get stuck in a loop all the time. As a matter of fact that's exactly the word I use to describe it. My poor husband takes the brunt of it and I don't know how to stop it. I see 3 different doctors now. I'm over 3 years POST TBI and I am straining our relationship. How do you stop the loop??

Oct 17th, 2016 5:57am

My ex husband was a very violent and abusive man. He had head on brain injury due to an accident in a swimming pool during his teenage years. His personality greatly changed after that. I wonder... Are all reckless behavior by TBI patient purely unintentional? Does he know that he is reckless and impulsive?

Sep 23rd, 2016 2:46pm

There are several posts expressing a need for connection and understanding. If anyone whose friends aren't there right now wants to reach out, I would be so happy to connect with you. Even if its just email, I'd love to just talk. My name is Ross. I am a student at Arizona State University. My email is recarlto@asu.edu   

I know this is kind of weird and out there, but please don't be afraid to reach out.

Sep 16th, 2016 2:39am

When I ask for help or accompaniment for a seemingly simple task or walk to the store it would be nice to have that person say sure ok lets go rather than a selfish un-understanding no or brush off reaction as that is infuriating. Like its not embarrassing enough to need assistance for basic ass shit. Add a mental breakdown and full on embarrassment ensues.

Sep 12th, 2016 12:17am

I'm so glad these comments are here. My son suffered from TBI, it's been 8 years and he's still trying to find ways to live a normal life day by day

Jun 5th, 2016 2:21am

I will not stray away from you, you are my friend . Smile, you are so special..

May 29th, 2016 8:33pm

It would also be nice to hear, I love you

Apr 5th, 2016 7:28pm

Okay first of all I have TBI supposedly.  I was in a car accident in a coma for 2 1/2  I had to learn everything over again but I do so much for everyone and when they can't find someone I find the for them I don't even live with someone and I make a suggestion and it's there I can do everything I did before my accident so why do they treat everyone with TBI the same it's getting really old I feel like I'm a kid again and what I want to look up there's nothing about what I want to look up is that because they don't know anything or everything about TBI I think it varies from person to person and also I think the person ask the way that you treated if they get treated like a kid they act like a kid to get treated like they have responsibilities they act like they have it so I think they better do a little more research on the subject case close

Mar 31st, 2016 12:45pm

I received TBI following a RTA in 1972. I lost my vision speech and my left side Useless. It was worse than learning as a child as I was  5' 10" farmer and rugby player.my Vision slowly returned.It took 30 years for my speech to not stutter, this gave me more confidence and I felt less self conscious. I have to take part in exercises to continue my ability to walk with a limp,I just wonder how long I can continue.How it would be good to run. So lucky to be able to take part in outwardly normal life.Nice to hear you look fine, l understand how any disability effects you.

Mar 18th, 2016 6:00pm

You are doing great! I admire your strength and courage, please help me to understand what you need me to do to help you.

Feb 25th, 2016 3:20pm

Just an FYI for caregivers-watch for loops-being caught in a cycle of repetition that leads nowhere. This is extremely frustrating and would be nice to have this pointed out, because most times we don't see it.

Jan 8th, 2016 4:34pm

it would be wonderful if someone said 'well done' or 'good job' after I have struggled for ages to do some simple task in their minds.  it is exhausting to accomplish anything and a kind word would mean so much to me.  all I get is 'you're too slow' or 'you need to hurry'.  people need to stop and think :)

Dec 14th, 2015 3:26am

Would be nice to hear at least one of theses... Not sure if I ever have? Living with a broken brain has been rough but I'm still going.

Sep 21st, 2015 11:47am

https://vimeo.com/channels/novavision/41094802

Sep 19th, 2015 4:32pm

My acceptance of my TBI has taught me that "the old me" is gone, and to deal with me now! # 9 is not true for me!

Sep 15th, 2015 1:34pm

I disagree with number nine. Because we have changed and that's the problem! Everyone wants the old you back, but that's not possible.

Sep 1st, 2015 10:47pm

I was told that talking about my brain injury was victim mentality. I got TBI by domestic violence and don't know how to deal with it. It scares me

Aug 16th, 2015 4:39pm

I was in the backseat and the car began to flip and my head smashed through the back window, the two in the front walked away with nothing. I woke up in the hospital forgetting my whole childhood and paralyzed. I can now walk but do not remember my childhood, just middle school and up. Since the accident all my best friends stop talking to me and seeing me, these have been life long friends but now they say I complain and cry to much. Do I want to? No. My emotions just jump on me, I wish they knew that. These times are hard for me, I used to workout everyday and school and work, now I sit at home with an IV and get pumped of fluids. I have lost 50 pounds and continue to lose. More then ever I just want my friends, but they are gone. As the old me is as well.

Jul 14th, 2015 4:30pm

At the time of my injury I was a Level III Trauma Emergency Room Nurse.  Now I sit at home and have never been called by my supervisors or my Manager, it is coming on 2 months,  I was in the ICU unit of the hospital, I was there for 3 days until I was downgraded.   I have only been called by 2 nurses I work with and other nurses are telling them to ask me what I need.  If the nurses really cared they would put out an effort to talk to me and assess for themselves what I need, I sometimes cannot express what i need and also call some of my conversations, word vomit, and when I hear another you told me that yesterday I actually repeat it again every 30 minutes until i get my point across that yes I will excuse your rude behavior but that that person will have to put up with what I call "my therapy" until I feel their ignorance has been handled or in other words "reeducated".  I am proud to say I spent seven years taking care of patients in the emergency phase of their care and being their voice and their advocate to their families very sad I may not do this again,  I am a medical professional with training in this area and it is still very hard for me everyone is not alone

Jun 12th, 2015 1:12am

I suffered a TBI in 2008. I am what some call, "high functioning". People don't seem to understand how hard EVERYTHING is for me. A lot of effort goes into not looking helpless. I don't know which words could be said to make me feel better. I, most likely, would forget them pretty soon after hearing them, anyway.

May 26th, 2015 11:40pm

I GET REALLY MAD WHEN PEOPLE SAY, WELL YOU LOOK ALRIGHT TO ME, IGNORANT BASTARDS, IF THEY SAID. I CANT IMAGINE WHAT IT MUST BE LIKE FOR YOU, BUT IF ITS ANY CONSOLATION, YOUR LOOKING QUIET WELL. IT WOULD MAKE ALL THE DIFFERENCE. GOD BLESS ANYBODY WHO IS GOING THROUGH THIS SHIT, STAY STRONG, AND TRY AND STAY POSITIVE, X DENNIS.

Apr 18th, 2015 7:43pm

I have a brain injury and people try to do everything for me and do my thinking and just drive me nuts if I do things on my own then they come and baby talk me then say I do a super job and then critique what I do. Then do my house cleaning or laundry

Apr 2nd, 2015 6:19pm

I've been reading and learning a lot about TBI. I'm so sorry for all the hurt that my words actions have caused you. I will never get in your face or complain about things you haven't done yet. I understand that this happened to you because you fought for our Nation and were providing a great life for me and our kiddos! I promise that I will NEVER call you names or make fun of you again! I will never nag at or blame your for my problems.

Mar 29th, 2015 3:33am

This July will be 19 years  suffering from TBI.. And  only 5 years ago  I finally found a doctor  to help me with my issues.. The memory is the worst  part of  my life  like remembering  to take my meds remembering things  my wife ask me to do  and just dealing with everyday things... The  biggest  and dumbest thing  I have ever heard is ......"there isn't anything wrong with you" and "Your just as normal as  anyone else you dont have any issues."

Mar 18th, 2015 5:35pm

i will walk beside you on this new journey in your life, if you would like a friend. at your pace

Mar 16th, 2015 1:25am

Do you have any paperwork that you might need help filling out?

Mar 15th, 2015 11:45pm

I wish family could be more understanding. Just because it happened 12 years ago doesn't mean I'm all better. Some symptoms will never go away. Like narcolepsy anxiety etc.

Mar 9th, 2015 8:57pm

When I was six months old I suffered from a TBI. I'm now twenty one and many things have been said to me and the worst one ever said to me was " your first real steps were your last real steps". That one gets me the most. It's hard for people to understand what we have gone through but that's no reason to be rude and hurtful to us.  

Mar 3rd, 2015 8:46pm

I would like to hear .... They finally approved your social security .... After all these years it would be great! Been A TBI Survivor since 1975 when I was 1yrs old.... makes me wanna cry now just thinking about it ....

Mar 2nd, 2015 4:56pm

My husband always tells me he just wants to help me have the best life I can. It is very comforting. It is not easy to be a carer or to be understanding at all times. When he is frustrated or cranky with me I remind myself that he does truly care and has been an incredible support for the past 12 years since my brain stem stroke and surgery.

Feb 20th, 2015 1:29am

I may not mention your health issues however I know you have them and I know you struggle. Please let me know when you are not coping or need to rest.

I WILL TRY TO UNDERSTAND.

Feb 19th, 2015 11:49pm

That people don't believe you because you are high functioning at times and apparently look normal but they don't see the struggles you face. That people would just listen and believe what I am experiencing is very real for me.

Feb 19th, 2015 11:21pm

If you take longer, can't do something as well, or need a certain thing:

"It's OK."

and

"What would you like to do today?"  

Feb 19th, 2015 11:13pm

I'm over 14yrs post severe TBI. The WORST thing said to me is "you are living in a NORMAL world, you HAVE to be NORMAL!"

Feb 18th, 2015 7:45pm

In addition to most all of these things, I would appreciate not being preyed upon.  Don't steal my inheritance, because it would be "wasted" on me or take my home, because you think people with disabilities don't deserve dignity, respect, nice things or a life.  Don't assault me, because you can get away with it, because the police will just lie, and say it never happened when it did, and then don't cause me more brain injury as revenge.  I have a brain injury, and even though I may not be able to organize my thoughts, I do remember clearly without hallucination or conflation.

Feb 18th, 2015 4:37pm

I HATE when people tell me that I'm to high functioning for TBI. I have speech impediment, memory loss, hard time processing auditory information, have difficulty with coordination, word and reading comprehension, etc... I maybe able to have high levels of conversation and be able to walk without assistance but don't you DARE tell me I don't appear to have a TBI

Feb 18th, 2015 3:26pm

Im about 20 years out from a serious tbi. im able to be a functioning member of society. i have some memory problems still, coupled with a knee injury. i have to try harder. but, thats just the way it is. i dont set unrealistic goals. i try to keep things as simple as possible. for example, my place is small. that way i dont lose track of things and its easy to keep things organized. i dont have a checking account. dont need one. its just unnecessary clutter in my mind. i write myself notes if i need to remember something. i never wanted kids or a family like that. i do ok for myself, but would struggle to support a family. i try to keep things as simple and strait forward as possible to eliminate confusion.

Feb 18th, 2015 3:09pm

Follow through with your offers of help.  So many times, people say "anytime you need anything, let me know, I will be there to do whatever you need".  Yet, whenever you need them, everyone disappears. 

Feb 18th, 2015 2:34pm

I believe you and that day to day struggles are real. I wish family would not get defensive and take it personally. Some days im worried about the future because at this point I dont know what to do. Its like I lost the ability to plan and my past jobs are so spuratic that nothing makes much sense. Im 25 years out and wish I had the connectivity and figuring things out again. Its hard to explain.

Feb 5th, 2015 4:01pm

I am an advocate for people with brain injuries. I let them take their time when trying to do a task.  They feel so wonderful when a simple goal can be reached. Be patient ,kind and understanding. Take them on outings, the store,a walk, a meal, helping clean their house or something they enjoy.  Most  of all be patient and kind !Do not judge,make fun of or put anyone to shame. Remember  they are people too. Its never a burden to help a person with a TBI, its a joy to help friends!  Aloha

Feb 3rd, 2015 9:36am

Can you tell me how you feel?

Feb 2nd, 2015 5:14pm

I am coming up on 15 years, this August and my FAVORITE comment has always been:  "so, are you completely recovered?"  If they only knew the journey that lasts a lifetime....

Feb 2nd, 2015 5:04pm

I have suffered from TBI since 2007 & am still dealing w/memory issues, since of direction & depression. I Ann able 2 return to work in a different career as before the TBI. I'm having problems getting support from my family financially due to me being on disability & not having money to purchase the vehicle to perform this job. Being told no so many times has made me stop wanting to try anymore.

Feb 2nd, 2015 4:56pm

I'm in my 10th year adjusting to a TBI, PTSD and constant chronic pain from extensive back and neck injuries from a vehicle collision. Having extended family and friends not believe my injuries and challenges are real is like salt in a wound. When I'm in sweat-soaked sheets fighting chills, sleeping by the toilet, having nerve ablations, or standing lost in Lowes...I chuckle to myself "Yup, I'm faking this SH@#!" I'm walking by faith, and not by sight. Heaven's a Pain-Free Zone...ya just can't get there on your own terms. Never quit!

Feb 2nd, 2015 1:53pm

It will be 18 years this July that I have survived TBI. It does not go away, but life has gotten better. Still, I take back to lessons I learned when i was recovering, to hold ground to who i am and grow from that.

Feb 2nd, 2015 12:55pm

I was in a car, stopped at a cross walk, rear ended by a truck. "Only" injury was a delayed onset TBI (30 min. maybe?). Why didn't you go to the hospital in the Ambulance? Well, because they asked if I wanted to go. How dumb is that? Anyway, lost my home, lost my business and lost me. Would have liked to know there was support available from BIA and 'net.

Feb 2nd, 2015 12:25pm

My son has TBI! It is very hard on individuals who have this problem! It is hard on the family as well! The ups and downs ... not knowing when they are going to explode next! God Bless you all!

Jan 15th, 2015 1:44am

I get depressed every time I'm done working. I have a tramantic brain injury. Of short term memory problem. People at work talk on the phone to people about me all the time. And to the guests. I work as a housekeeper at a hotel.

Dec 12th, 2014 5:23pm

I wish I'd heard, "It's OK if you can't do that right now."  With my family and at work, there was no space to say I wasn't up for something right then without getting blamed or told I needed to do it anyway.

I wish I'd heard, "We're really glad you're here.  How can we help you make this work?"  I was often criticized, told I couldn't participate, or made to feel like I shouldn't have come.

I wish friends and family had accepted the symptoms I was describing, instead of saying I looked fine and implying it was just something I was making up, or that I was overreacting.  TBI symptoms are described by doctors as being "sporadic" and "diffuse," so it is actually normal for someone with a TBI to have trouble with something they had been able to handle yesterday, or to report a collection of odd symptoms that don't seem to have any relationship to each other.  

I wish people had listened and responded instead of nodding, saying, "Oh, uh-huh" and going on with what they were saying or doing without really processing that I'd just said I was having trouble.  

Nov 27th, 2014 1:02am

I love you today and tomorrow!

Nov 13th, 2014 6:41pm

~~9. The you that is YOU hasn't changed. You just have a harder time thinking than you used to.
– Fred

I have amnesia, I lost my identity and almost all memories, and went through hell for 5 years after the injury. I recently (6 months) began recovering memories as well as the ability to imagine, and I wish there was one person in my life who would have treated me like the phrase you wrote. I suppose people did try to treat me like that, but they really just didn't know me.

Nov 3rd, 2014 3:35am

I had a injury, my X boyfriend hit me in the head 7 times with a fireman flash light, in the back on top where Yr memory is affected, I went to the doctor, memory loss ,throw up head aches ,dizzy ness vertical ,my mind is to fast to connect for what I'm doing at the time. Inpatient, irrationally when I get irritated., loss of family and frirnds

Sep 26th, 2014 2:55pm

Honestly...there's not one thing that can be said that helps or makes a TBI survivor or caregiver feel better because what one TBI survivor struggles with will not be the same across the board. However, what DOES help everyone, I believe, is this: My advice to anyone a TBI survivor or caregiver has reached out to: PLEASE do not pretend to understand and do not try to give advice according to how someone not struggling with TBI would need. TBI is complex...extremely complex. Just listen and be sensitive to their needs. Do they need to be alone? Leave them alone. Do they need a shoukder? Give it to them. Do they need distraction? Be a distraction. Be their friend. That is all

Sep 24th, 2014 10:10am

My son was extremely intelligent and prided himself with his above average problem solving ability. After his TBI, he lost all executive skills.we asked him to separate cans and vegetables that were mixed together in a box. He couldn't do it. He knew the difference between them but has no organizational skills to know how to put fruits on one side and vegetables on the other. He says it is like someone flips a switch and turns his brain off. He calls himself retarded. That kills me. I told him that all that intelligence is still there, he just lost the ability to express it. I tried to think how I could explain it in his terms. I told him it is the result of a physical injury. You had a serious car accident that you weren't expected to survive. You didn't break your arm or leg, you broke your brain! The most difficult thing a TBI person has to deal with is knowing that he will never be the person he was before the trauma. After hearing other people's stories I know that my son isn't the I only one who lost the people who were supposed to be his best friends. It hurts me so much to hear that they just want to remember him the way he was! I just want to shake them and tell to celebrate the fact that he beat all odds and survived... He's different... Not dead!!!!!

Sep 21st, 2014 4:19am

Acceptance is the key,have to accept the person you once were has left the building, and you just have to get on with 'normal' things in the only way you can now, 'uniquely' Don't be afraid to be different, who wants to be the same as everyone else. T.B.I survivor since 1992 Sharee Seymour

Sep 19th, 2014 11:56pm

Here is a few I wish I heard. My reasons are beside them

I believe you have issues I cannot see...... I am tired of explaining my TBI's and what they do to me.

If you want help just ask...... Almost as bad as no help, is being suffocated with help. We need to push our limitations but as always safely. Missing a few teeth by pushing too far.

I know your not stupid or drunk..... We all had that one, your drunk/stupid etc

Well done, that was tough for you........... Bit of praise goes a long way especially in the early days

You have changed but you are still you, just a bit different than you were......... The fear of losing yourself is a base fear non survivors never understand. Just once it would have been nice to hear the truth. Better than your the same. WE KNOW WE ARE NOT, lying about it makes it worse.

What do you want to do and how can I help......... This is a hard one as you hear it said but it is not what is meant.

There are loads more but they would be a start.

Sep 19th, 2014 11:56am

I don't understand as I have never had a brain injury, but I promise to be here by your side as you take things one day at a time. You are not alone. Carole Billingham

Sep 19th, 2014 10:59am

I can't say I understand all of the struggles. But am an empathetic person. I was in a bicycle vs car collision at 14. A small fracture to my head. I remember the severe blinding headaches lasting 2 years. The memory problems and anger just cropping up out of nowhere. I am 57 now with an eventful life. I have been a caregiver 3 times so far and love and patience is the best I could ever do. Happiness comes in small moments not always big events. Grab onto them. And a hug is always appropriate just not always accepted.

Jul 19th, 2014 3:45am

I like many of you, have not heard the words we need to hear to help make our day. I haven't heard it from my brother. My mom really can't understand. My best friend compares her headaches with my TBI.  No one reads simple things about TBI's that I've given them. I now have 2 TBI's. I'm so lost and hurt. I feel no one really cares. It's great when the Vets get what they need, but how about the rest of us!

Apr 16th, 2014 6:37pm

I have TBI.....am 28 have an 8 year old son,I feel as though HE HAS MORE FREEDOM THAN ME :( This website is helping me understand things much better

Feb 18th, 2014 9:06am

I realize you have not been affected intellectually just because you have trouble with attention issues, memory, and in other cognitive areas that control or assist with your intelligence. I also understand that I may not relate to the way you do things because they are completely invisible to me and I can only assume your motivations from what I see. However, since I am an intelligent person and have learned from research the effects of traumatic brain injury ( short and LONG TERM) I realize that you are doing your best and I support you!!!! I support you regardless because you are my friend/spouse/other and I know people are motivated to do their best and achieve something with their lives as a rule and because I care about you!

Jan 23rd, 2014 3:52pm

I don't know.  I wish that people would talk to me.  That they would accept that im someone else.  Im so lonely but yet I cannot communicate well enough to move on.  I was a powerful self motivated person bofore but now im weak and need encouragement but get none.  Im laughed at and ignored. I just need someone to give me hope. Someone to love me.

Jan 22nd, 2014 1:31pm

I still want to be your friend even though it will be different and you may not ever "get better", I appreciate the person you are inside enough to weather through this rough patch and not walk out when it gets hard.

Dec 29th, 2013 10:00pm

When I am lost in my car and cannot find my where I'm going (in spite of having GPS) or cannot remember which way I turned at the last intersection,  I am frightened.  Deep breathing saves me from an instant anxiety attack.  This inability to lay down a retraceable path still interferes with my living comfortably with my disability.  Still I am grateful that I'm alive every day, and  that I can drive.  I send love and energy to both the TBI's and their caregivers out there.

Dec 19th, 2013 2:37pm

The points made above are excellent.  Too bad after 13 years after having suffered a brain tumor surgically removed and the resultant TBI issues, I never heard any of them.

Dec 7th, 2013 2:22pm

"What happened to me inspired me to go into this field and do the job I do every day, to help people like you. To let you see it's not over and you can get back to where you were! I wouldn't change a thing that happened to me." -Said by me (Kasey) to my patients. I'm an 11yr TBI survivor and An Occupational Therapy Assistant.

Oct 25th, 2013 8:52pm

I am your friend, and i trust you.

Oct 8th, 2013 7:27am

Just seeing you smile is fantastic for me

Oct 6th, 2013 10:44pm

"I will gladly help you in whatever way I can that is within my means".....(my severe TBI was the result of an uninsured motorist speeding thru a red light....i got no compensation.)

Oct 5th, 2013 3:10pm

ACCEPT THE HELP-when given to you!-that was HARD for ME to "accept" since I wanted/am a "very independent" person!:)-don't "think" more about "things" than you should-write you "a reminder post it note"-I have "post-it" notes EVERYWHERE in our house!-lol-if your reading something-HIGHLIGHT IT or "follow along" with your finger and BOOKMARK IT!(helps ME a lot)-smiles-and "tell" your caregivers "THANK YOU" verbally!....and SOMETIMES A HUG IS "APPROPRIATE" OR A "HAND SHAKE"-they do a lot too!-Marcia, a TBI "survivor"

Oct 4th, 2013 6:51pm

"I understand love about your hurt brain and it doesn't matter to me, I love you just the same"

Oct 4th, 2013 2:29pm

"One cannot smell flowers from a galloping horse."....Chinese proverb....

Oct 4th, 2013 6:29am

I Love you just the way you are!

Oct 3rd, 2013 8:50pm

Have a good sleep, I'll see you/ talk to you when you get up.

Oct 3rd, 2013 5:15pm

If only people understood each injury is unique.....not to google and say yours doesn't match up perfectly therefore yours is not a "true" brain injury. It effects relationships, memories, likes, dislikes, some things you have experienced are New again. You can see things differently like the flicker of a leaf on a tree is magnified....you can hear and see each movement with such clarity. There is not a timeline on healing so do Not hold me accountable to whatever you have read....again each injury is unique.

Oct 3rd, 2013 5:13pm

Its not so much what is. said as a mom of a child with brain injury, it really bugs me when people treat my child as non human, she just wants to be accepted justlike everyone else.

Oct 3rd, 2013 4:58pm

There are times I "waffle" with my decision. Trying to figure out what is BEST. Just give me time, I try so hard! Sometimes I don't know how to express my needs or what I want, just stay with me, don't hurry me, & DON'T berate me. Thank you for letting me vent. Still dealing with limitations 36 years post TBI (1976) Bobbie

Oct 3rd, 2013 4:46pm

I should not have to be the one to that has to educate you on what it is like to live a day with my chronic and life long condition of brain injury, but I will try my best to! As I am taking it upon myself to continually learn & accept my entire life! Caring and simple compassion go a lot farther in helping me to understand what I am up against and dealing with on a daily basis, going moment by moment! Judgement, ridicule, guilt and shame are reckless tactics to control by individuals who really have no control in their lives! So they think by controlling your broken world with their numerous convictions and judgement are what makes the world go round and makes themselves feel better! When truth be told that is the farthest from the truth! It sucks to be openly honest at times, but this is our reality now! I still have support from wherever I can receive it and by those who accept and do not judge intentionally!

Oct 3rd, 2013 4:11pm

I will not tell you that I have already answered that question. I will just answer you again.

Oct 3rd, 2013 4:07pm

You are not damaged goods. You are still worthy of love and I still love you. You're not stupid and I am sorry for making you feel that way.

Oct 3rd, 2013 1:05pm

A friend who had a TBI told me to \\\'be easy on myself...be very patient with myself...\\\' It helped so much.

Oct 3rd, 2013 12:43pm

I don't understand your injuries or how they affect you and your family, but I believe in you enough to know they are real.

Oct 3rd, 2013 12:19pm

We are your family and we'll always be here for you. You're my son and I would love to visit you weekly and bring you dinner so you have one day of not worrying about it. Is their anything we can do to help you at all?

Oct 3rd, 2013 12:12pm


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